Showing posts with label humor. Show all posts
Showing posts with label humor. Show all posts

Schadenfreude

Schadenfreude is a word that I've seen appear more and more frequently lately. Maybe it's because of the rockiness of the real estate industry. Maybe it's because it's becoming a new fad. Maybe it's just because when you are thinking about something, it tends to stick out at you (selective perception). We'll get to the meaning of the word in a second.

A common wisdom in investing is "a rising tide floats all boats". The general concept is that when things are going well all investors succeed, no matter how flawed their plan. Anyone could have made money by investing in dot-coms in the late 90's. A monkey could have picked dot-coms and tripled his money. The same thing happened with real estate in 2000-2003. Every investor, speculator and flipper made plenty of money.

Warren Buffet is credited with scribing the corollary to the above rule. He said "when the tide goes out, you can see who isn't wearing shorts". He was saying that when things get bad, you can rapidly tell the investor with solid plans from those who are just floundering along. The winners continue to survive, but the losers collapse. While the stock market crash in 200 hurt nearly everybody in the US, the most devastated were the individual investors who had no idea what they were doing. Their portfolios were demolished because they didn't actually know how to seperate true value from irrational exuberance.

The tide is going out on real estate. Now we finally can find out which investors have a solid plan in place, and which ones were just flipping with no understanding of the market. Now we find out which homeowners have avoided playing with their equity, and which ones took out loans like they were candy.

Schadenfreude is a German word that means "to take pleasure in someone else's misfortune". Other people's misfortune is never really a great thing, even if it's largely deserved. However since I am human and prone to human weaknesses, I have found myself taking some joy in the blogs that expose "investments" gone bad. We can all learn a lesson here.

First on our list is the father of all deals-gone-wrong. Meet Casey at www.iamfacingforeclosure.com. I've mentioned him before so I won't go into too much more detail.

Close to my beloved DC is the Bubble Meter. The photo near the top of the post is from their archive.

Then we have the blogs that, through sifting MLS databases, have found flips gone bad.

The best of them, in my opinion is probably OC FlipTrack. They do a spectacular job of showing homes, their purchase dates, price histories and even their HELOCs.

The next up Bubble Tracking also does a good job of showing what a bad deal these people got themselves into. He provides you with the percentage loss each property has generated (if it were sold at the current price).

Short but sweet is the mantra of Flippers in Trouble. This site doesn't waste time or space, they just give you the numbers. At the moment, their top find is a poor sap who'll be taking a $600,000 loss before any commissions.

Since Irvine seems to be a very popular place, we can also visit Irvine Housing Blog, who gives us a variety of real estate news in addition to the Failed Flops he's Found. He also uses the term Schadenfreude in his blog description.

And last, but not at all least we have San Diego Market Monitor, who doesn't give you a photo of the property in question, but makes up for it with links to the county assessor's office.

The sad part of this story is that while some of the speculators will be able to absorb their loss and move on, many can't. Taking advice from self-proclaimed "gurus", they've over-extended themselves and are headed down a road to financial devastation which will undoubtedly reach into all other aspects of their lives as well.

Are you interested in real estate investing? No problem, there's still money to be made. The good investors, with careful research and planning, are going to continue to turn a profit. That being said, it's also an extremely dangerous time to make a mistake in your investments. In a typical market, even a poorly planned real estate venture has a solid chance of nearly breaking even. In today's market, a poorly planned misstep can easily cost you hundreds of thousands of dollars.

Oh, and for the love of God, don't be another idiot flipper. If you intend to flip a house, at least try to add value to it before you jack up the price.

For your amusement

I think you'll really enjoy this best-of post that I came across on craigslist.

The kind of Landlord I am

1. Responsible for the weather
My building manager called to say one of the tenants wanted a discount for the days it was hot outside. Why? Because it was also hot inside. Their electricity is fine. They could run both air conditioners and fans and keep a supply of popsicles, just like I did in my apartment. My response: Will you pay extra if the weather is nice?

2. In charge of the animal kingdom
A tenant complained about mice. I sent over an exterminator several times. He stuffed steel wool in holes, baited traps, sprayed outside etc. Eventually he refused to go back because the tenant continued to leave open packages of food on the floor and counters. She insisted I was responsible for the problem. As if I commanded the mice to invade her house.

3. Menace to domesticated animals
One tenant was convinced I was poisoning her and her wooly mammoth dog with carbon monoxide. (What will I think of next?) Fire department went over there. Gas company went over there. City of Evanston sent an inspector. Everyone who tested got the same result. No discernable level. She tried to deduct $200 from her rent to pay for her vet bill. This woman also accused me of running a bicycle chop shop in the basement. And wanted me to compensate her for a parking ticket she got in front of my building.

4. Pet killer
I hired a carpenter to fix something. With the tenant’s permission, the carpenter went into the apartment. Apparently the act of opening the door scared the dog. The dog ran down a set of internal stairs, bumped his head and died six weeks later. This story was condensed to “Landlord killed my dog.” There are several neighbors who will not even say hi to me. One of whom made it his mission to make sure my landscaping is always in 100% compliance with arcane City ordinances.

5. Made of money
Tenant asked to break her lease because the price of her anti-depressants went up. No mention of the car she just purchased. Maybe she thought the hint of mental illness would scare or embarass me. She was three months into a twenty four month lease. 24 month lease she specifically asked for.

6. Heartless
Contrary to popular belief, I do not enjoy evicting single mothers at Christmas time. It takes months to evict and the landlord rarely recoups the back rent or court costs. FYI, I do not think it is more important to make your car payment. Thanks for asking.

Please pay your rent on time and remember, I am not omnipotent or an evil genius. A lease is a business arrangement.
And one more thing, why oh why wait until Sunday at 8pm to call and say your heat has been out since Friday afternoon? You call immediately if the microwave burns your popcorn.
Biff and I haven't had any incidents like the ones mentioned here... but it's only a matter of time.